Frustration Just Ahead

Today i am hoping that if i write my frustrations down it will help me feel better, so here we are:

I am frustrated by the waiting for my portfolio marks and worrying if I pass all of them. I am frustrated with the world and all its constant wars, death and lack of humanity that we all do nothing about.

I am frustrated by people and how easily they break one another’s spirits, how they pass on their insecurities and inadequateness into the lives of those around them.

I am frustrated by my own indecisive about the future; should i do this Honours in Journalism? Should i take the year off? Should I, Should I..... too many options and too little time.

Frustrated by my job, even though I am immensely grateful to have one where I am still helping people all be it indirectly. I can’t help feeling that this is not my calling, it doesn’t motivate me to get out of bed in the morning, it doesn’t bring me the kind of joy i seek.

I feel numb, unappreciated and tired. This might be the end of the year “blues” getting the best of me but as far fetched as it  may sound my body, mind and spirit yearns a holiday without stress or any of the frustrations life brings.  

All of this being said i know that i am frustrated by external factors outside of my control as well as internal factors that i can control if i worked at it. I know that i need to simplify and extradite the noise in my life so i can redefine my balance.....Yes all these things i know however right now I yearn silence and none of the complexities of the world, a book and my sofa for a few days and i will be right as rain. 

The end of one road, the beginning of another!!

This week a very good friend and university class mate set off for a new adventure, the island lifestyle in the land of smiles she tells me. She packed up her life, sold everything she owned and headed off to Phuket in pursuit of her dream and bring her closer to owning a B&B on an island somewhere.

It then dawned on me that since we have all finished our final exams and handed in our final portfolios this really marks an ending to a chapter in our lives.We have spent 4 years (on and off) many times thinking we would not make it being bombarded with assignments, having full time jobs and lives.

I am so proud of her and all the other people i have been privileged to spend these years with and call friends.  We have shared so much laughter, cried together at loss and spent so many weekends working on deadlines (right now it seems like it was ages ago).

On this journey we have learnt to live without regrets and  to get up whenever we get knocked down by a bad grade or a stint of gossip. We have learnt to nurture friendships and value good relationships. Getting here has made it very clear to all of us that nothing is impossible as long as you keep working at it. 

On a personal note, the future looks exciting (I foresee many new journeys and learning curves just around the corner). 

The road to get here has been long and winding with many breaks in between but as i think back its been worth it.