Showing posts with label God. Show all posts
Showing posts with label God. Show all posts

Thursday, 29 October 2015

Wisdom from silent corners

Life can be incredibly short so do not waste it idling on could have been dreams or should have been wishes.

Live your now as best you can. It might just be my age speaking, but it is a special kind of gift to be able to be present for the things that really matter. Being mindful of the life you have can be incredibly rewarding at the oddest of times.

You might not yet own those possessions that you think you need; like that house you want, or that car or have that job that speaks to you but there are many things you do have. You have your faith, be it a belief in God, Allah, Brahman or to attain spiritual enlightenment like Buddha. You have your health, which may not always be great but you wake up every morning.  You have family, they can be the one you are born into and the one you acquire through years of living.

I read somewhere that it takes a special kind of courage to do great things and all those great thing inevitably comes from being the best version of you possible


Tuesday, 14 January 2014

INVICTUS

For some reason i find myself thinking of the movie Invictus and found myself stumbling across the poem, if you have watched it you might remember the poem recited by Morgan Freeman close to the end and that it was a favorite of the man he portrayed so well in the movie. I think Obama also makes reference to the poem in his speech at Nelson Mandela's memorial service, especially in the lines, "I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul.".



The poem was originally written by William Ernest Henley in my opinion to show might in the face of adversity, the Latin meaning for Invictus is after all "unconquerable"!

Thursday, 9 January 2014

At the Gates of the Year

I have been trying to put my year in words but have failed miserably to capture it all until i found the poem below by Minnie Louise Haskins (1875-1957):

GOD KNOWS 

And I said to the man who stood at the gate of the year: “Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.”

And he replied: “Go out into the darkness and put your hand into the Hand of God. That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way.”

So I went forth, and finding the Hand of God, trod gladly into the night. And He led me towards the hills and the breaking of day in the lone East.

So heart be still:
What need our little life
Our human life to know,
If God hath comprehension?
In all the dizzy strife
Of things both high and low,
God hideth His intention.

God knows. His will
Is best. The stretch of years
Which wind ahead, so dim
To our imperfect vision,
Are clear to God. Our fears
Are premature; In Him,
All time hath full provision.

Then rest: until
God moves to lift the veil
From our impatient eyes,
When, as the sweeter features
Of Life’s stern face we hail,
Fair beyond all surmise
God’s thought around His creatures
Our mind shall fill.

So as my journey into 2014 begins, i am humbled by the year i leave behind.  It has been a year that has seen me shed more tears than laughter, a year that has taught me great lessons on loss, life and faith. A year of revelations and one of sincere appreciation for things like life and death.

I don't know what this new year holds but God knows!

Thursday, 30 May 2013

"To this day" by Shane Koyczan

Stumbled across this video and i personally found it to be profound. So take the 12 or so minutes to really listen to what he says.



Friday, 24 May 2013

Things i wish i knew back THEN!

My niece is entering her teen phase and she asked me a very interesting question recently about things i wish i knew when i was a teen. This made me sit and ponder on lessons learnt from that very testing time when i was a little miss know it all.

I wished someone had informed me:

That i can do or be anything - That there wasn't limitations set by the world for my dreams as long as i worked hard. Oh and that 9-5 was overrated if i got stuck in something that i wasn't passionate about and that didn't get me excited.

The choice is always yours - Life doesn't randomly happen, in the end we choose what and who you keep in it.  In the end you need to take responsibility for your choices, the earlier to start the sooner you will see different perspectives.

Be different - Conforming to the norm is boring, don't try to be who you are not. Be the original you, not a carbon copy of someone else. So many young people try to be other people and in the process loose themselves to the ills of the world.

Never hand over your power or take things too personally  - If you hand it over now chances are you will go through your entire life doing it too. Walk away from the arguments that you don't see fit to be in and fight for the ones you believe passionately in.

Have faith and start believing while you young - The older you get the more you realise God is actually very real and that if you believed a little more in His plan and a little less in your wants, things may have turned out pretty different.

In the end i think life teaches you what you need to know on the journey!

Tuesday, 19 February 2013

OUR GRANDMOTHERS

She lay, skin down on the moist dirt,
the canebrake rustling
with the whispers of leaves, and
loud longing of hounds and
the ransack of hunters crackling the near
branches.

She muttered, lifting her head a nod toward
freedom,
I shall not, I shall not be moved.

She gathered her babies,
their tears slick as oil on black faces,
their young eyes canvassing mornings of madness.
Momma, is Master going to sell you
from us tomorrow?

Yes.
Unless you keep walking more
and talking less.
Yes.
Unless the keeper of our lives
releases me from all commandments.
Yes.
And your lives,
never mine to live,
will be executed upon the killing floor of
innocents.
Unless you match my heart and words,
saying with me,

I shall not be moved.

In Virginia tobacco fields,
leaning into the curve
of Steinway
pianos, along Arkansas roads,
in the red hills of Georgia,
into the palms of her chained hands, she
cried against calamity,
You have tried to destroy me
and though I perish daily,

I shall not be moved.

Her universe, often
summarized into one black body
falling finally from the tree to her feet,
made her cry each time in a new voice.
All my past hastens to defeat,
and strangers claim the glory of my love,
Iniquity has bound me to his bed,

yet, I must not be moved.

She heard the names,
swirling ribbons in the wind of history:
nigger, nigger bitch, heifer,
mammy, property, creature, ape, baboon,
whore, hot tail, thing, it.
She said, But my description cannot
fit your tongue, for
I have a certain way of being in this world,

and I shall not, I shall not be moved.

No angel stretched protecting wings
above the heads of her children,
fluttering and urging the winds of reason
into the confusion of their lives.
They sprouted like young weeds,
but she could not shield their growth
from the grinding blades of ignorance, nor
shape them into symbolic topiaries.
She sent them away,
underground, overland, in coaches and
shoeless.
When you learn, teach.
When you get, give.
As for me,

I shall not be moved.

She stood in midocean, seeking dry land.
She searched God's face.
Assured,
she placed her fire of service
on the altar, and though
clothed in the finery of faith,
when she appeared at the temple door,
no sign welcomed
Black Grandmother. Enter here.

Into the crashing sound,
into wickedness, she cried,
No one, no, nor no one million
ones dare deny me God. I go forth
alone, and stand as ten thousand.

The Divine upon my right
impels me to pull forever
at the latch on Freedom's gate.

The Holy Spirit upon my left leads my
feet without ceasing into the camp of the
righteous and into the tents of the free.

These momma faces, lemon-yellow, plum-purple,
honey-brown, have grimaced and twisted
down a pyramid of years.
She is Sheba and Sojourner,
Harriet and Zora,
Mary Bethune and Angela,
Annie to Zenobia.

She stands
before the abortion clinic,
confounded by the lack of choices.
In the Welfare line,
reduced to the pity of handouts.
Ordained in the pulpit, shielded
by the mysteries.
In the operating room,
husbanding life.
In the choir loft,
holding God in her throat.
On lonely street corners,
hawking her body.
In the classroom, loving the
children to understanding.

Centered on the world's stage,
she sings to her loves and beloveds,
to her foes and detractors:
However I am perceived and deceived,
however my ignorance and conceits,
lay aside your fears that I will be undone,

for I shall not be moved.

By: Maya Angelou 
(out of the book a Heart of a Woman) 

Wednesday, 30 January 2013

Remembering...

My uncle was a remarkable man, he lived his life with such vigour and ease. He was a silent man most of the time yet when he walked into a room you would know that he is there.

He was sometimes hard headed and cocky but he loved being the only uncle we had; he relished being the big brother to his 4 bossy sisters (my mom and aunts), a husband and a father to his sons. As a teenager he use to knock down my room door just to check if i am alive, he is one of the few that never saw my eccentric nature as weird. He literally just let me go with it and i loved him dearly for that.

Knowing his really gone is harder than we all thought it would be, even though we have had months to prepare for it and say our "goodbyes" there still feels like a decade has been left unsaid.

His wife will miss him most as she watches their grand kids grow up and their sons marry off and start their own lives. My mom and her sisters will also miss their steadfast brother, even though they have years of memories he won't be a phone call away anymore. He won't be there anymore.

In all this sadness i take heart in knowing that God called him home at the right time and He has my uncle safely nestled against His side watching us all as we continue to soldier on. I pray his soul has found peace and that he knows he was loved and will always be missed.

“It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.” ― Rose Kennedy

In loving memory of my Uncle Greg
26 January 2013

Thursday, 17 January 2013

"New Things"

Before i delve into this new years list of goals I'd like to reflect on the year i have left behind. It was not the easiest of years to begin with, dealing with sick parents, hospitalisation and some curve balls that in essence led to some incredible revelations.

It was a year of closing chapters, leaving things behind, finishing projects and moving on.

It was one of those years you couldn't help but grow in. One of deep thought about life, love, loss and the world (in my head i think i have probably gone over solutions on world peace more times than most).

Reflecting back 2012 i realise it was a year of finding more of myself, the stressful bits and all.

For 2013 there is NO RESOLUTION for my goals are simple:
  • Good Health 
  • To nurture great relationships 
  • To learn and keep grounded - life would be boring if i wasn't learning a thing or two from it. 
  • To love 
It will be a year of new jobs (as i take on a juggling act of 2 very different roles), new surroundings, new relationships and a whole new set of lessons.

I am looking forward to the nail biting challenge of getting through this one still intact.  

Friday, 23 November 2012

An AHA moment

I was asked out of the blue a few days ago; "How short would your life have to be before you would start living differently today?" 

Even though i know that intellectually each breath could be my last, i still find myself spending an astonishing amount of time thinking about things i cannot change - possible futures, pasts mistakes and what could have been done differently. 

The truth is; the end of our lives is always just one breath away.  I think that for me living habitually is a way of denying this truth.  A way of saying that I have all the time in the world to change, to live differently, to live joyfully, to live meaningfully, to help others, to take risks, to love unconditionally.  

How short would my life have to be?  It already is as short as it could possibly be. 

Thursday, 15 November 2012

Taking time...

I have a crazy obsession with lists and getting things done on time but I have recently been feeling very disconnected to myself, impatient with the world and like my life just has an entire list of things i am not ticking off on.


I am not a depressed person and wallowing  in my self pity doesn't really get me anywhere so I have decided to take it to God.

This might sound weird but growing up my mother was religious on teaching us about "quiet time" and "meditation". Now as an adult i think i have lost some of that inner balance and my communication with God has become stifled by everything else life throws my way.

So i am literally taking a step back from myself and the world and letting my impatience go because i really can't control it all. I am also letting God knowingly lead, my plans clearly might not be His. As scary as it is to  hand over the sails of my boat (life); true patience is after all the handing over of my own self-will (that wants to control it all) into His perfect will (that already has a master plan).

 

Thursday, 25 October 2012

A little perspective

There is nothing like the near death of someone that you love to give you a little perspective on life and how you live it.

For the last month and a half my mom has been in and out of the doctors office, been put on various treatments and now has a bed in a NO VISITORS ward while they try and find an antibiotic that agrees with her body and will reduce the size of her liver.

I can't imagine how scary it all must be for a women like her who has raised 3 kids, seen 4 grandchildren and a great grandchild into this world (and all the noise it brings) to be so isolated from home. My mom is a home body, give her time in her yard and the company of any one of her sisters and she is in her element.

For me its a different kind of scary because i have never been faced with the thought of loosing my mom until now, i know she won't live forever but i at least hope she will be around to spend a few Christmas's at my house and help to usher my kids into the world so they are as fortunate as my nieces and nephew to call her theirs. Its scary to think how short life is and how we take the time for granted because we think we have plenty of it left, when in essence we don't have much.

I haven't been to see her yet; if i am honest i have just not had the heart to get on a plane and be there among my siblings and to visit her in a hospital of all places. She also tells me it's not necessary that i rush home because she is fine but i know that at the moment she is not fine, so i feel a bit like a bad daughter for not being strong enough to be there alone and be faced with the reality that time might run out sooner than i thought.

So with fear and all i have booked my tickets and gotten the time off work to go home; i am unsure of what to expect, unsure of what my arrival will be greeted with but i look forward to seeing my mother and having her enlighten me with quirky stories and lectures of hospitals and faith.

Tuesday, 18 September 2012

What matters.....

As long as i keep being me, as long as i keep being true to myself and who i am it does not matter how many jobs i get or don't get. It does not matter how many times i change direction on this journey called life.

None of it matters.

What matters is that i am living in my truth, and the people who need me will find me. And i will find the people i need. Whether it takes a week, a year or 2/3 if its written it will be.

I some how know that I will find the answers I need.
But more importantly, i will find the Questions.

(Thank you Jennifer Pastiloff for the reminder)

Monday, 17 September 2012

Taking Time

Time i Say 

I am a big believer in reflecting on life and taking time out from the hustle and bustle of it. I must admit I don't often get the time or have the energy to sit for hours just pondering on life but this morning i woke up before the crack of dawn with some thoughts/ truths to share.

I feel like life is short for most of us and the more we put off, the more we won't be able to do. It definitely does not work like a to do list that you can tick off and move on to the next task or fork in the road. Life is unpredictable, it so not a romance novel or a TV series where the "good one" somehow always win. It has moments of heart wrenching sadness and exhilarating happiness all wrapped up in lessons that we try to learn from.

Life can get messy and sometimes lonely even when you are surrounded by hundreds of people. It can also be filled with exasperating adventures and "chapters" waiting to be explored.

I realize that in this life if you are everything to everyone, you may end up being nothing to yourself.

So take the time to find your joys and embrace it, whether its climbing a mountain or sitting on a park bench with a good book. Take time to do it, share it with someone special.

Take time to live for the moments of right now, cause tomorrow or next week might not come.

Thursday, 6 September 2012

Writing my BOOK


I love to read, I can literally spend hours in the thrills of a good novel and completely cut the world out so that the characters and I can embark on a journey together. I have a very visual imagination so I often find that it would put it into pictures hence I am not picky about endings as long as at the end I can feel like “I got it”, like I understood the plot.

Little Me
Lately I have been thinking of life (my own) as a book; with all its chapters culminating various stages, highlights and lowlights of my 27 years on this planet. Granted this is not as long as most, but I sure have learnt a thing or two.

It would have to starting with my first fond memories of garden tea parties when I was 4, through to my peculiar child hood where I have always had an opinion and a mother who would listen to my every entertaining word – when I was 7/8 I refused to go to bed at bedtime because I felt that my brain didn’t need all the hours of sleep and I would become so animated in my theory that my parents would just let me stay up.

Through my odd days as a teenager, I was not a difficult teen  but I was definitely always different -  I preferred  a good book over parties, drugs or boys.  There is a part of me now that thinks I have taken the world way too seriously before my time and another that is grateful that I have somehow always known myself enough to know when to stop, step ahead or step away.  

My journey from18 to now would be the bulk of it; because here I have learnt about love (the kind that does not change or falter), loss (as no-one lives forever), sacrifice (the art of walking away), friendships (the kind that deals with shit and still stands) and to chase my dreams even if it takes me a little longer to get there. 

I am not sure which chapter I am on right now however I think turning 28 in a few months will probably require a few new priorities. 

It promises to be interesting! 

Thursday, 30 August 2012

My "REVELATION"

I do not want to sound philosophical about life and death but both are fickle things, you think you have it figured out one minute then in the blink of an eye it topples you over for a 10 and you left thinking 'what now?".

I don't think we ever really get it figured out. We deal, we manage and we get on with what needs to be done.

I have an uncle who is very ill at the moment and reflecting back on his role in my life i am struck by how powerful it has been. I remember him as a rough, rouge of a man with a personality that could literally fill a room. He use to barge into my bedroom when i was in my teens and demand to know how i am, he use to sneak me sweet when his wife wasn't looking and because he never had a daughter i always filled that role with giggles and hugs. I have always admired his ability to laugh at life and how he encircled his sisters and would do anything to protect them.

I have not seen him in a long time but on the phone i can tell that in the midst of his illness he has become sullen, like he knows something we don't.  It saddens me that life and the thought of death can do that to a man so brave however in my heart (somehow) i know that he will be okay and get through this stronger than before.

I also realize now that growing up i have been fortunate to have three fathers, one by blood, one by family and another by love. All of these men have played amazing roles in who i am today; they have loved me, laughed with me, nurtured me and supported every decision i have ever made.

Their lives have blessed mine!

Saturday, 21 July 2012

A moment of HOPE

I read a blog by Jeff Goins tonight and it reminded me that in an unjust world there will always be things that we cannot understand; things live violence, death and loss so to get through every trial we need to step out in faith and rely on God to get us there (wherever there might be).

In essence as crazy as it may sound we will never be taken on roads/ journeys that aren't meant for us, the more i see and live in this life i realize the truth in this.

It's evident that we live in trying times and its also crystal clear that we need too "Lean not on our own understanding".

Let us take HOPE away from every situation, test or trial because tomorrow will be better than today and in it we will surely find a new lesson.

Tuesday, 19 June 2012

Today's Reminder...

Life and Light

When i saw the picture for some reason it made me thing of the a verse on Annie where she sings... "The sun'll come out Tomorrow, Bet your bottom dollar that Tomorrow there'll be sun! Just thinking about Tomorrow clears away the cobwebs and the sorrow...."

With that i realize that Life isn’t a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, latte in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming ‘Woohoo WHAT A RIDE’!